Because, boredom.I met him at the mall. Eyes like sky. All seeing and never judging, even in the dark it’s all I can see. He says hi. I bleat. He says hi again, I sigh then whisper hi. He asks why I’m whispering, I scream it’s nothing. I want to please him.
He says his name is Gbolahan, I wonder why he’s speaking to me. I’d always thought boys this pretty were gay. I smile my toothy smile boys call beautiful, it feels inadequate. I say my name is Jessica. I haven’t used that name since primary school, but the Chinelo I always insist on being called doesn’t sound beautiful now.
We’re waiting inside because it’s raining outside. He says we live in water and I ask what? He says we live in water and I say yeah, although I don’t understand. He says only the sky and the ocean live forever. Everything that isn’t lives for a moment. Above and below it, the blue stretches forever. I’m openmouthed and I think I drool a little because he stretches his right hand and mops below my red lips. I spy his tattoo and ask what he’s got written. He says full circle. I ask why he doesn’t just have it drawn and he laughs. My god he laughs. A gust of wind wafts out his mouth and I bury myself in it. He smells like the rain. He says full circle as in coming back to the original position. I think he could have had it drawn but I say oh. He stares for a while and I look everywhere, anywhere, but at him. He asks if I’m waiting for someone and I say yeah. He seems disappointed, so I say I’m waiting for a female friend I came to shop with.


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